The trouble with bookshops is that they are as bad as pubs. You start at one and you drift to another and before you know where you are, you are on a gigantic book-binge (R T Campbell)

And so dear listener, I am about to enter a period when confidentiality becomes of the utmost. Not only have I been told that my Sheriff Court jury duty may last up to two weeks, but I have started an evening class, where people may decide to bare/bear their soles/souls. I have been here before and what I will avoid is reference to actual people; the class itself……..?

It is mindfulness based stress reduction. Yes. It is. Now mindfulness was described to me by J, the blog’s favest philosopher, as a better understanding of the here and now and that is a fairly good representation of it. J also has a very literary background which often finds me starting up the Google just so I don’t appear the kinda cretin who, one Embra Festival, thought a play devoted to Nijinsky was about the horse and not the ballet dancer. 🙂

And I can get round it cos the class seems to be based around a book with eight chapters and much of what we do is to discuss some of the things raised in the book and then practise them.

Which brings me, dear listener, to ‘mindful eating’. At the end of the evening, dried fruit was passed around and we all had to take some. Okay, my first mistake was to start eating before I was supposed to but, being a greedy bastard, I still had some left. Basically the tutor chap talked us through experiencing the activity and getting us to be aware of tasting, licking, salivating and then biting.

Tbh, I found it mildly erotic. Which, I don’t think, was its aim. Luckily the word mastication was not used or I’d have corpsed. It was like a fruit pastilles advert of years ago. But I enjoyed it. Some of the periods of silence were good. 🙂

The first time I’d ever experienced a group silence (and let’s leave Partick Thistle out of this) was in Alternatives Community Rehab in Easterhouse where relaxation techniques are used cos many people recovering from substance dependency find it difficult to relax. My first experience of this was in a room where I knew none of the eighteen people and worried for an hour – by maybe the third time, I was beginning to relax. I also did acudetox (five and five since you ask) and that one where they light a candle and stick it in your ear. That’s a good one. 😀

People often comment on my relaxed state. I did talk recently about getting some new garden furniture but e laughed, saying I don’t sit down long enough to make it worthwhile. She’s right. I’d an uncle in the Milton in Glasgow who, in the days of just two channels, couldn’t stop getting up and down to change them. This family also introduced me to the joys of eating chips and potato fritters –mmmm, two ways of deep frying potatoes……

And then the Chinese put a pineapple in one of theirs and the culinary world was never the same again. 🙂

Anyway, I must be mindful of my word count limit and move myself on.

Incidentally, I went to the zoo the other day. There was only one animal in it. It was a dog. It was a shitzu.

And I can’t help but feel that a TV ad for the Vanish Tip Exchange is an advert for the product Vanish. No. No reason.

And finally, I got some really nice good wishes from the zombies (and the run has started – http://scotlandsthemepark.com/event/outbreak-mds/#.Vg7E7I2FPIU ) especially Michelle, Zoe and Sophie to give them their human names. Sophie said something really interesting; she reads the blog with her morning cup of tea. If this were really a radio programme, then the obvious question would be – where do you read yours? So. Where? 😉

Cya, still wearing that badge and still keeping it simple.

Johnt850, absolutely cream-crackered

There’s a programme on BBC 1 Scotland on Monday night at 9pm looking at legal highs in Scotland.

One question, I’m often asked about legal highs is, why are they legal? Basically they’re not illegal. Originally they were plants that gave you a slightly similar buzz to cannabis but now they’re newly made drugs made to bypass existing laws. By stating that they are not ‘for human consumption’ or that they are ‘bath salts’ or ‘room odourisers’, sellers get away with selling them legally.

I have seen their effect on people and it can be horrible but the Queen has said she’ll do something about them and I trust her.

Y’see if all potent substances had the same legal quality controls that drugs such as alcohol and tobacco do, then there wouldn’t be a demand for ‘legal highs’ but watch the programme and see what you think. I know what I think…….

As requested, here’s Maclemore and Ryan Lewis……

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