‘Money is the gift that is never returned; green is always the favourite colour; and large fits any pocket (James Ellroy

‘Good evening peepers, prowlers, pederasts, panty-sniffers, punks and pimps’ (Ellroy)…….a slightly different intro from usual…and, as my old mate, Arnold Brown used to say….’why not?’

So some of you will have seen the midweek blog which was all zombie, and this week is part zombie party and part James Ellroy, so if you like your blogs straight, Pringle-sweatered and the same fourball for golf every Sunday morning, this blog ain’t for you……(t850)

Let’s begin with the zombie party.

It started with much the same textual intercourse between me and the good Dr W as last week (Skippy, you did get clearance on that phrase, didn’t you?)….’You going to the zombie party?’…….’Dunno. You?’…..’Dunno.’ and ended eventually with ‘No, jt, you’re picking me up just before 8.’ And I did. 🙂

(There was a wee girl at W’s – a neighbour’s wee girl – who asked if I knew how to tie shoelaces, and I do, so I did.)

So we arrived. (Last?) And it was a very sober affair, which for me, just days short of being eight years sober and substance free, which was good. 🙂

Basically, fruit juice and nibbles, karaoke, a conga line through the snooker hall at M & D’s, men dancing with men, men flirting with men (Yes. I like you too, Ross, but……), women dancing with the men who……, the Time Warp, more karaoke, the Slosh, the Alley Cat, the plate smashing…(hang on, was there plate smashing?), did I see a cuddly toy? (yes), did I dance? (yes), was homage paid to the lovely Katie? (yes) and did all the ladies look gorgeous? (yes) 😀

So how good was the night?

Let’s just say I woke up with hangover and a framed photo of me as a zombie lying on the pillow beside me. That good. (No. Totally sober)

So I hope every zombie will forgive me if I pick three ppl from random for the success of last night; Jason for showing me some moves and shapes; George for asking me about the blog; and Zoe for being Zoe and you know what Zoe’s like when she’s Zoe – well she’s ‘just’ Zoe; and, of course, the gorgeous Dr W and her vegan plateful of onion rings and chips…….. 😀

A brilliant crowd and a brilliant night and if I can help with anything, just shout….:) 🙂 🙂

And then there was James Ellroy the night before. He is the world’s greatest ever living author and he has much influenced. My style. Of blog writing. But he doesn’t know that. Somewhere, in one of his books, he sums up what I liked about drinking – that moment when the ‘hot’ whisky trickled over the back of my throat. Orange juice will never be the same. 😦

His mum was murdered and they never found who done it; he stopped drinking and abusing Benzedrex inhalers when he was in his twenties; and he describes his attitude to the films made of his books as ‘Film studies can do what the fu*k they like to my books as long as they pay me.’

He very kindly inscribed a copy of the book to the good Dr W (in her Sunday name and with a good appreciation of her) and he spoke to folk for about a minute each at the signing. He describes his books as ‘being for the whole f*ckin’ family, if the name of your family is Manson.’

[Yes. It is a thick book, but it’ll be a good one. Can I borrow it after you?]

Two amazing nights in two amazing nights. What could top that? Answer to the usual address with the usual reply.

Another hero seen……brilliant writer….start with the Black Dahlia [unless you’ve just been given a book called Perfidia]

And finally. Homage to George in Cresswell and Co (hairdressing and beauty emporium) who is the only person in the entire world (other than Sandra) who I would trust with my hair. But see the girl (didn’t catch her name) who washed my hair – she also did a scalp massage. That, more than any coffee I drank on Saturday morning, woke me up…… 🙂

Cya, keep(ing) it fun and still wearing that badge? No. It’s a Remembrance poppy this week.

Johnt850 – ‘the slick trick with the donkey dick’ (Ellroy but……… 😉

Many years ago, I was the Promoter of the Goalden Shot for Clydebank Football Club and every three months I would attend the prize giving dance in the Hampden Lounge of the Bankies Social Club and this is how they would finish the night…….wonder if the Rocky Horror Show’s coming soon to Glasgow?


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