If you don’t have time to read, you don’t have the time, or the tools, to write (Stephen King)

And I’ll explain the relevance of that in the serious bit below the line.

And so, dear listener, something has happened that may change my life but the main people involved have asked me not to reveal it on social media and I will try to get round folk on an individual but highly random basis. Actually it won’t change my life at all. I’ll stay a really nice guy. And that is beginning to annoy me. 😦

It’s the programme called Master Baking for Beginners (or similar). My interest was aroused in that at a very young age. Meringue? No. You’re right. It’s not so much the Bin Gate thing but the continued use of innuendo particularly from the bearded tw*t (so many vowels fit, don’t they?) who so many women fancy despite his indiscretion(s). I was with a group of women of a certain age on Saturday, and there was definitely the hint of ‘I would’ coming from their middle-class lungs.

But it was his latest innuendo that had me boaking;

‘the length is good on this one.’

Y’see I couldn’t get away with that. ‘That’s most unlike you, jt, they would say.’ And it’s beginning to annoy me. But I don’t know what to do about it. And anyway, I’m a grower not a shower. My tomatoes what I grew were sweet and tasty and my cucumber was well worth waiting for. 🙂

I am every woman’s nice male friend and it’s beginning to grate. Some people may even think me gay. BUT I AM NOT GAY. I AM INCREDIBLY HETERO. AND IN REALLY GOOD WORKING ORDER.I AM ALL MAN!

So I was at this sea food cookery course yesterday, and it was jolly nice. It was in the old (?) Jacobean Corsetry Factory in Virginia Street Glasgow….not a corset or basque or (I’ll stop there) in sight and it was really good. It was a birthday pressie from my sis. And I thoroughly enjoyed. Those were the women who ‘would’ the tw*t.

We cooked and ate full servings of meules mariniere, scallops with julienne of spaghetti of vegetables, simple squid, lobster bisque with langoustine and brandy (I passed on the brandy and I sometimes wonder if that’s the problem but if my lack of drinking is the problem then there’s nothing I can do about it) and crab and avocado gateau with lemon dressing. And I learned how to chop an onion.

I’ll need to run it off at some point and I can do that at the Fitness Club I go to in Paisley where I’m now going on a Monday night where they think I’m nice and fit for my age. Aaaaargh! But it’s a nice compliment. And I am. 😀

Maybe that’s the problem. People see the age before they see me. I’m convinced that’s the problem when I try to go fishing. My worm hasn’t been nibbled for ages. One of my co-workers thinks I think too much and is going to help me if we ever find a quiet moment. And that’s another thing. When the shout comes I can hit those tenement stairs pretty damn quick with alarm buzzer, keys and phone.

So. No.. More…Mister….Guy….. (Maybe I should shave my head?)

Incidentally, Dr W (and this is a non-sequitor to anything I’ve just said) I did ask if they did vegan courses and they thought that might be worth trying and they’d let me know and if they did, I’ll come with you…..and a big thanks to e for helping me with some very specific shopping the other day and to uni-Sharon for introducing me to the Fitness Club. 🙂

Mmmmmm not the most ruthless of paragraphs but I will try.

And finally, next week’s blog will explain why I’ve not done any Ice Cold in Alexandria challenges but have opted for the much easier challenge of abseiling to my death…sorry…. down the Titan Crane in a fortnight or so’s time. And I’m hoping to raise some money for Prostate Cancer UK. And that’s another thing; I am neither impotent nor incontinent as I explained on BBC Radio Scotland a few months ago and one of the double page spreads the Daily Record did about me a wee while back would confirm that.


Cya, keep(ing) it fun and still wearing that badge? Buffed and polished for the big day….sorry…the other big day, given that one has just happened.

Johnt850, fit, well buff and available…..

So this blog has remained pretty referendum free cos it is non-political in that my views are mine and I won’t use this vehicle to inflict them on others. (I’m nice that way) But I have been so disappointed in the way social media has been used. I’ve seen lies and non-truths and conspiracy theories shared or re-tweeted without anyone reading them before they do that. So many people pass things on without reading them or checking the facts or the context; things which the much derided media have to do because there are laws and regulations that can be used if the media get it wrong. But proper complaining involves so much more effort than just passing it on and saying ‘typical BBC!’

Anyway, I hope there is a Yes vote but after it we have a long period of consultation and compromise..something notably absent from the current debate…and then in 2016 we have elections when we can vote for who we want – even the Unionist parties will have to have a change of thinking……..but I worry for the Facebookers out there who have never physically knocked on a door, handed out a leaflet or engaged in proper debate. For whom Russell Brand is a political hero. Then there’s a lot of women who ‘would’ him anyway.

John McLean was an early political hero of mine. And James Connolly. I have books of their writings if you ever want to borrow them but it might be too much effort for many. Here is a song (it’s an old recording) commemorating one of the many times McLean left prison. Krassivy, Krassivy – ‘beautiful and red’. He didn’t achieve all he wanted to do either.


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