Christmas (Old English: Crīstesmæsse, meaning “Christ’s Mass”) is an annual commemoration of the birth of Jesus Christ and a widely observed holiday, celebrated generally on December 25 by millions of people around the world (wikipedia so it must be true)

And finally I am vindicated. The Daily Record (now sadly (eh?) without Jim Traynor) has entered the debate. It also asks;. Is age is merely a number? (18th Dec 2012 pp 14-15) They agree with me (without specifically saying so) For me it’s not a case of wanting to be 21 again…it’s being happy to remain 42 for the rest of my life. And it’s Christmas so please ignore the quantum leap in logic…….Let’s see people for what they are….individuals not numbers.

But for every good thing there’s a slight downer. Caffeinely, I lapsed. Now those of you familiar with the work of Prochaska and di Clemente will know that that is not a bad thing in itself so I happily put my hand up to a cup of Crown Plaza cappuchino in the company of BBC Al, the blog’s bad taste pal during the week…..such interesting thoughts from Sue Hi-de-Hi Pollard on the future of the BBC. Lol (As Carmen would say)

And then I got home to find all the doors smashed open and everything gone. I mean what kind of person does that to an Advent Calendar?

Yes. It’s Friday; it’s five to five and it’s Cracker Gags Time…….so as they say when they serve Oasis soup, ‘You get a roll with it….’ 🙂

So I’d a smashing Christmas lunch with some of the folk who use the project down West Dunbartonshire where I do some volunteering but it’s a hotel which I shall not name along the Great Western BOULEVARD where their idea of a non-meat dish is cod seared with bacon and leaks. I scraped off the bacon and justified it to myself by saying  – I am such a hypocrite –  but did come away with this gem;

Q: What do you get if you cross a cowboy with an octopus?

A: Billy the Squid.

And a big thank you to all those who ‘liked’ my Facebook post about my six years’ sobriety (46) and the interesting stories which I shared by many means with many people. I wouldn’t begin to tell people that my way is the only way to sobriety but I am more than happy to share my experiences. Which is what this blog is about.

And nice to see so many students from the college where I taught passing on good wishes………. 🙂

Q: How do snowmen get around?

A: They ride icicles.

And can anyone tell me what the awful Joan McAlpine SNP LIST MSP meant, in the Daily Record,(18th December 2012 p 13) when she wrote…’One look into Connecticut killer Adam Lanza’s dead eyes tells you something was wrong.’ Yes, Joan, they tell you he’s dead! Or do you mean people with staring eyes are loonies and should be in asylums? I never ever thought I’d be sorry for pretentious Pat Kane.

Q; What goes hahahaha, clonk?

A: A man laughing his head off.

And I liked the photo showing how much we are in an Age of Austerity by having a Fairy Liquid bottle at the top of the Christmas tree. I wanted to do the same thing with ASDA’s own label Apple and Pear but it ain’t quite the same……altho’ tbh, that does sound like some of the teas I’ve been drinking recently.

Q: Why would you invite a mushroom to a Christmas party?

A: Cos he’s a fun guy to be with.

And I’ll miss muffin the mule on BBC 1 😦  This has always been my fave piece of children’s TV music……is it yours, children?

Q: Why did the man get the sack from the orange juice factory?

A: Because he couldn’t concentrate.

And finally, yes, I do send out a lot of cards and msgs and mails at this time and to use a word that was used a lot in the last fifteen months there is an agenda – to let people know I am alive. Six years ago I was incapable of doing anything. Present giving and some card writing and paying off credit cards and arranging cleaners to come and clean t850 Towers after  Cold Turkey Sunday was all done by Son Brian and KT, my sis, my ex and her man and my next door neighbour……… well as coming to see me in hospital. There is no other agenda (apart from folk smiling)

And on that lovely note, here’s this year’s bad taste gag….

A pet is not just for Christmas, you can curry it on Boxing Day….(and I apologise for any offence I may have caused but it’s a helluva lot funnier than David Mitchell, Miranda Hart and James Corden on Michael McIntyre the other night)

Cya, (keep)ing it fun and still wearing that badge? Oh, indeed yes…….it speaks volumes for the last six years.

Johnt850, who ten years ago was a hard-drinking, meat eating, coffee drinkin’ BBC journo, but, baby, look at me now.

So to caffeine…..and whist many people may not see it as a drug, it is in tomes such as Street Drugs (Tyler), Out of It (Walton) and Forbidden Drugs (Robson) and I don’t want to get into disease v learned behaviour as a model of addiction debate but making certain changes to my behaviour (do I really need a coffee to type in words in a computer?), a certain amount of prescription substitution (de-caff) and maybe now and again allowing myself a bit of harm reduction (one cup every so often) may well lead to some controlled drinking (a lot less than before) after my detox…….

Yes. Once I get my Master’s done (if ever) I will write that book. We drink and do drugs cos we like what they do to us. Initially.Then  things happen.

And a slightly sheepish word of apology to the Good Dr w (she knows why) but also my thanks to her for suggesting this week’s close to the show. Why have a turkey for Christmas when you can have a duck…….? Watch and learn. I have no control over any inappropriate advertising that may accompany this.

And next week’s the Annual Blog Personality of the Year Awards Ceremony so, in the meantime, from Skippy and me, Merry Christmas 🙂 Enjoy the vid 🙂


One Response to “Christmas (Old English: Crīstesmæsse, meaning “Christ’s Mass”) is an annual commemoration of the birth of Jesus Christ and a widely observed holiday, celebrated generally on December 25 by millions of people around the world (wikipedia so it must be true)”

  1. dawson koppold Says:

    that’s long reading

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