Well you impress me so completely I start obsessing to hear from you Whatever you do, you do sweetly It takes a lot to not take from you

Message or no message – and you the listener decide – those lyrics don’t look quite right, do they? It’s Jack White and it’s The Raconteurs so obvioulsy it’s brilliant ‘cos everything he does is brilliant (mostly) but it’s possibly because I can’t get Village People’s YMCA out of my head at the moment that I’m not hearing things properly. And I’ll tell you for why in a tryst.

I was going to play the radio edit version of Barber’s Adagio for Strings by Tiesto off the album The Ultimate Workout Mix for the fitness fanatic that is W, but it’s not got words, so I won’t bother. Tiesto‘s playing Braehead at the end of the month and there’s a guy I know, lives in the high rises and he works in that shop where the dead man bought his drink and he was talking to another man and he said,’ No I’ve stopped going to Braehead. Do you still go jt?’ and I realised he was talking to me and I don’t think he was talking about Xscape.

Wouldn’t it be great to have a programme where you could find out what you were doing when you can’t remember what you were doing? What? Oh, yeah, it’s called Facebook. Actually in my shallow youth, it used to be called the Beer Bar at GUU on a Saturday morning. (rrm, you’d be amazed at what I’ve just deleted there! No. No reason!)

And, yes, it will soon be Christmas. Log fires and mulled wine. But will I be invited? I was at a Christmas Fair a few years ago at a Scout Hut in Bearsden and I bought some small Chrissie pressies and I’d a plastic cup of mulled wine for one pound. I made it as far as the ASDA car park in Summerston and had to go for a walk to clear my head before I could drive the remaining five hundred yards. A burn and a half that one.

So Happy Birthday, Son Brian. 😀

So, speaking of car parks, let’s talk about Bellshill and its YMCA. As some of you know I do volunteer awareness stuff for The Prostate Cancer Charity, and it’s not all about appearing on the telly. But why Bellshill, you ask? Well, there’s something about the place that means so much to me, short but pleasant memories and full of temptation……so I’m pleased to say Friday lunchtimes at The Derby Inn, Bellshill Main Street seem very much the same as they always did. 

What’s that, Skippy? Something more up to the minute and more contemporaneous and that I talk about a lot at the minute? You know me so well, Skip. Yes, folks, I did go and visit the Bellshill Cultural Centre and Library, where I understand they do Zumba lessons on a Friday. Em, the North Lanarkshire hyper-link to it only showed a blank screen just now, so I’m not sure what else it does. And it was raining.

(And I must find a route to Bellshill that means I don’t drive into Bothwell Services Station Car Park and drive through a No Entry sign into the Fallside Road.) 

The Health Fair itself? Pretty badly attended even with the offer of free food and free condoms….not at the same stall! Naw, it was supposed to run from two to six but you know it’s not going well when the Bowel Cancer and the Anti-Smoking people give up at half past three and why did the young lady from Terence Higgins Trust leave after I started chatting to her. So it finished much earlier than expected. Which had a resultant knock on effect even in these days of mobile telephony.

It wasn’t all bad. I came away with a large leek, two potatoes and an onion and four condoms (2 x ‘naturale’, 1 mint and 1 chocolate)  and two bottles of water. Willing to share all above.  Actually a memory of Braehead is coming back.

But I’d just like to say thanks to the people of Bellshill for their apathy and for, basically, screwing up what should have been a simple wee notion of mine. ******* *****! They don’t deserve Christmas Tree lights. At any time of the year. 

So, and finally, almost a final word on the sub-committee in that I have one more presentation to go (e, that’s you that is) but I’d like to thank Missie K for a very interesting and thought provoking lunch, eh powerpoint, and you’ve risen a million times higher in my already high estimation of you (and your new Converse All Stars) for something you said BUT (to quote someone recently) the final decision will lie with bestest friend Caitlin who I don’t think has a clue what we’re talking about, therefore her judgement will be unbiased. Or the Pope. I could ask the Pope. Pope Benny.

Like, anyone out there in any universe knows what we’re talking about. lol, mweh, hahahaha, 🙂

cya, keep(ing) it fun and still wearing that badge.

But I’ve just remembered. A female member of staff gave me a donation of £3.40. No. No spoken reason. Maybe I was doing something for the wrong reason.

Johnt850, or as I used to be known down the Braehead Fantazia, the epitome of quasi-funky spunky weirdness.

But at the end of what should have been an okay day with a pleasant five minutes even, would one drink have been so wrong and bad for me?

Robin Williams in Friday’s Herald;

‘It’s like, ‘I can be somewhat circumsized.’……It’s that idea that you can have one drink – no, you can’t. Within a week I was drinking heavily. It was so quick that even I was like ‘Wow!”

It’s funny, and I don’t know if Robin feels the same way, but those times when I prepare to talk to unknowns about my addiction or my dealings with cancer, I really need to psyche myself up and whether it happens or not, it still takes a lot of coming down afterwards. That’s what makes a Prostate Cancer Charity volunteer so different from so many people who were there. 

But I do owe one or two people an apology. And an entire town. Sorry. I should have gone out for the walk first. 😦

There’ll be other days. Hopefully. And maybe one day I’ll grow up. Maybe.


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